Friday, May 13, 2011

Quick Review

Sorry it's been awhile since my last post. I was busy finishing off my latest book 'SNIFF THE ARMPIT OF SUCCESS,' as well as doing some PERSONAL GROWTH workshops with Kim Jongl Il. It's been a difficult time for Kim, as he has a lot of negative energy from feeling inferior to his father. I told him, 'Kim, you've got bombs, money, opium and women. Enjoy these things and the doors OF WINNING will open to you.' After this, Kim smiled and invited me to an orgy with three 18 year old virgins.

It might be good to be Kim Jong Il, but it's also pretty good to be me too.

REMEMBER: A loser in a Gucci suit is better than a loser in Primark jeans.

Monday, April 18, 2011

THANK YOU POULTON LE FYLDE

You all took that step tonight towards the WINNER'S CIRCLE. I'm sure with my tried and tested techniques I taught you tonight, you can all go forward to your dreams. Apart from Mary.

Mary, I am sad to say, will never be a winner. She is a negative, sour old shrew. How dare she question MY WINNING CREDENTIALS! I have over 12 million in the bank, 32 sport cars, a silver watch, a DVD player. I have met and coached some of the world's greatest people - Peaches Geldof, Gary Busey,Jeffrey Skilling, Andy Gray.. Do I need to go on? Does that sound like the credentials of a NON-WINNER to you. Mary, you will never be happy because your negativity and OUTLOOK will eat you alive. Good riddance! Winners associate only with other winners. Go back to your cats and eating disorder.

Anyway, let me concentrate on the POSITIVES.

Good to see so many of you buying my book 'ALARM CLOCK YOUR WINNERS BLOCK.' Let it guide you on your continued path of success. Remember: success is a muscle and it must be exercised.

I was also happy to see a few of you buy a VHS of my seminar 'THE WINNERS CIRCLE: ARE YOU ON THE INSIDE?'

REMEMBER: A winner always wins: he knows no other way.

QUICK REMINDER

I will be giving a seminar tonight on SUCCESS MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUES at Poulton Le Fylde's Town Hall. Tickets are £3.00 and refreshments are provided. I will be going through step-by-step techniques to improving SUCCESS and SUCCESS OUTLOOK.

I will also be chatting to Bob Fairnsworth about how my SUCCESS COACHING had helped him. Before Bob was a simple shop worker, and now, thanks to my PROVEN STRATEGIES, he is ASSISTANT MANAGER of Argos.

SUCCESS IN PRACTICE
SUCCESS IN OUTLOOK
SUCCESS IN RESULTS

It's your first step to a life of WINNING.

LET'S CLEAR THIS UP

Sorry, but today I need to go off topic from my usual SUCCESS coaching breakdown. I want to clear something up which has been dogging my SUCCESS recently.

As you know, last month there was all this controversy about what I said at the annual SUCCESS COACHES 2011 AWARD CEREMONY.

I have been inundated with hate mail about this, so let me just clear this up once and for all. When I talked about the JEWS, and how the JEWS were responsible for causing every national disaster, I meant J.E.W.S. as in JAZZY EXISTENTIALISTS WEARING SANDALS.

Please, all this negativity-sending needs to end.

Peace, love, success AND WINNING to all.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

TRUTH POWER

Today, at one of my talks, a little ugly fella asked me: 'Canile, how can I be rich and successful like you.' I looked at this sweaty, short man with bad breath and said, 'You can't. You look in my eyes and see a winner. I look in your eyes and see loss and ugliness. You can cover your eyes, but you'll just be the same loser with sunglasses on - and probably not even Ray Bans.'

Truth is not easy, but that is his truth and he needs the OUTLOOK to move forward.

ALARM CLOCK FOR YOUR INNER WINNER

Okay, let's get down to this. I am a winner: a born winner with over 12 million in the bank. I have houses all over the world and stunning women in every city. How did I get this? What is the secret of my success?

Well,I will go through with you how you too can awaken that INNER WINNER in you and live the life you deserve.

In these blog posts I will reveal my tried and tested secrets for success*




*Most secrets will not be revealed, but I will link to my books.

WHAT STOPS US?

If you ask yourself this question: what is stopping me from success? What you will find is a whole bucket load of poor excuses and why me-isms.

Now we all know what seperates the winners from the losers is OUTLOOK. If you answered that you hadn't succeeded because of bad luck, people not spotting your talents, location etc - well, look out loser town we have a new resident.

Success is based on OUTLOOK. I didn't become a multi millionaire with excuses. I became rich through OUTLOOK and strategising what I wanted. If you see only obstacles then these same obstacles block your road to success.

So, what is stopping you now? That's right, nothing. However, if you are ugly then it is much more difficult. If your face is difficult to look at, lower what success is for you. Maybe success for you could be getting a date, talking to someone over the internet.. My point is, forget about my form of success: it's not for you.